I definitely did not write as much as a wanted to in October… Actually I only wrote on October 1st. But it’s difficult. The world demands my attention and my time. School. Church. Relationships. Work. Of course these are necessary and I love being a part of each, but sometimes its nice to just sit on my couch, and be still. And those moments are so rare for me nowadays that I really appreciate them when they come around.

Today as I was scrolling down Instagram I saw a quote that grabbed my attention.

Yes, I know. God is the one we should look to, but I want to explain this in a different perspective. Giving the glory to God always, but think about this. We have the ability to DECIDE how we will turn out. Our circumstances and culture do influence how you feel and how you perceive the world, but it is YOUR choice and your decisions that form the course of your life and your identity. You do not need a guy, a girl, a person, to change your entire life. You have the power to do that, today. This really ministered to my heart because I am in a season now where I have to want the change, I have to decide to let change in and trust that whatever the outcome, God is good. This is hard. Especially when the choice is yours. I can either sit here, stay where I am, continue to have a hidden box in my heart and defend myself any time something in that box is triggered…. Or I can choose to trust God, to believe that what He has for me is good, no matter the pain I feel now, the end of the process will be worth it.

And so yes, I decide to go in deeper, I decide to change my life, to open my heart and even though I am afraid, I will hold on to God with everything that is within me.

Leslie Tatiana

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