Sunday Morning

I love Sundays.

Sundays mean rest, family time, Revive.

Sundays also mean an end and a beginning. I made it through the week. Whether I conquered it or barely survived, I made it! And now, I get to try again, conquer this week.

A new week full of possibilities, full of people, meetings, goals. HOW EXCITING.

I dozed off into a deep sleep last night while pondering on my life (which I’m pretty sure I do every other night) but last night was different. I wasn’t reacting to what had happened during the week or to the season I am in. But instead, I was reflecting on what I’ve accomplished since my birthday and what I’ve realized.

I have been twenty-one for 3 months, two weeks, and one day.

I knew my birthday would be a turning point, that God was going to demand change, growth., maturity, did I mention change? I was in a season I don’t remember stepping into. I woke up one morning and my life was not my own. And I appreciate these last few months for different reasons, but I knew it had to change.

I came to myself, and I have learned so much about me and what I love…. also what I don’t love.

1. I am a leader. This sounds extremely silly considering I have been a leader in youth ministry and church for 7 years. In 7 years I was told I was a leader, I never really believed it for myself, until now. I have the gifts and the knowledge to influence people around me, and to use that to bring LIFE to others. I have the natural ability to stand out and lead a crowd, to set the pace, to be an example…. and I LOVE IT. It is such a privilege and such an adventure.
2. I love love love love all things business. There have recently been many changes and transitions at my job (I work at a salon and spa) and one of these changes gave me more responsibility. Along with this responsibility, I have begun a journey on a second job- which is also business related. And I woke up last week realizing how much I actually love what I do. I love learning how the business works, I love being a part of a business, I want to know everything. Busy schedules have been life to me.
   To do lists. Deadlines. Setting goals. Planning events. Encouraging staff.
   LET’S DO IT ALL.
3. Friends are important crucial. 20 year old (and younger) Leslie avoided friendships and relationships. If we were friends, it was really because of the work YOU put into our relationship, not because I let my guard down and let you in. I realized at 21, that I need friends… I need people to be there no matter my mistakes and my choices, but also to be around when I am thriving and accomplishing my goals. Friends are SO important and rather than spending my time avoiding people or even choosing the wrong people, I am learning to be picky about who I let around me, who I lend my ear to…. and not picky so I don’t block everyone out. I can honestly say, 21 is looking pretty great because of the friends who have chosen to fight past my tall walls.
4. I am hurting but I am not broken. It took me literally 21 years to realize this but I am so glad I am finally here! It feels like I was holding my breath for 20 years and as soon as 21 and some months came, I let out a big sigh and gulped in fresh air. I am not my mistakes, I am not what has happened, I am not my struggle. I am Leslie and I may have to face all those things but they do not define me. What defines me is joy, grace, kindness… ice cream 😉

I am confident that I will learn more about myself as I continue to dance once more with God, but I am so thankful to finally be here.

It will be okay, and it has been okay.

We’re doing just fine.

Dancing in His love